JUICE KUPO!

4/12/2020
1:30 AM

It's very late and I'm all alone with my thoughts. It's been a crazy few weeks and I think it has just started sinking in on me. The world is really changing. My Facebook feed is filled with ads for facemasks. All you hear and see are people with masks and gloves in public, keeping the distance from others. This is scary times, indeed. We are facing a global pandemic right now and it seems like it will take a long time until all of the chaos and hysteria are gone.

It's even scarier for me, being a healthcare worker. I am at more risk of getting this deadly disease than those who are staying at home. What makes matters worse is the shortage of protective gear for us. There are significant numbers of healthcare workers including nurses like me who have died from this disease. I do not say or show it but I am terrified.

We are experiencing major changes in society and these changes are actually overwhelming me somehow. The ignorance and stubbornness of a lot of people are annoying the shit out of me. The majority of us have become germophobes and fucking hoarders. I miss dining out with my girlfriend. I miss going out with my family. I really took those moments for granted. I miss going to work without worrying about my safety. I know being a nurse comes with the risk of exposing myself to different diseases but not like in this magnitude! I haven't fully recovered from the death of my dad and I cannot bear the idea of anyone else in my family dying.

A lot of people are taking the opportunity to capitalize and promote their agendas during this time of global crisis. A lot of people are more focused on monetizing the need for protective equipment rather than help flatten the curve of this pandemic. I think these greedy motherfuckers have a special place in hell - I really do.

If only I have a choice, I would stop working for now. However, I do not have the privilege to do that. I have plans and dreams that I need to fulfill. I need to carry on and survive - financially and physically.

The world is getting crazier by the day and everything is unfolding way too fast for my liking. It's hard to be an observant person and have to absorb everything you're noticing.

I wish for all of this madness to be over soon. I wish to be well and alive to witness that happen too.